| Production 47407|
Original Airdate: 6 May 1978
Jaime convinces Petey to stay in Hidalgo
Keenan Wynn as Gustave
Don Calfa as Petey "The Weasel" Regan
Diane Civita as Mrs. Frank Boylin
Henry Kingi as One-Eyed-One
Robert Easton as Colonel
Dave Cass as Janos
George Kee Cheung as 2nd Agent
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|"Long Live the King"||"On the Run"|
Jaime is paired with a double-crossing convict who claims he can identify the criminal the OSI is seeking.
Jaime: (about Max) He likes you.
Oscar: Well, I like him too, Jaime, I just don't want a tongue all over my face, that's all.
(Jaime laughs) This mission isn't starting out well.
Oscar: I don't know how to tell you this, Jaime, so I'm not going to try. This... (hands a file folder to Jaime)... is your next assignment.
Jaime: (does a double take) What am I doing on a Wanted poster?
Oscar: We want you to assume the identity of a real criminal. Now the real Blondie Malone is safely tucked away in a maximum security prison. That's about as respectable a reputation as you can get - considering where you're going.
Jaime: And where might that be?
Oscar: The town of Hidalgo, in the country of San Raphael, a notorious refuge for criminals, extortionists, murderers, gangsters - in fact, the place is full of nothing else.
Jaime: So, in order to make the guest list of Hidalgo, you have to make the Ten Most Wanted list here first?
Oscar: (chuckling) Guess so.
Jaime: I think I'm gonna need a little more information before I commit to this one.
Oscar: This... (pulls out another file folder)... which is practically nothing - is all we have on a master criminal called Frank Boylan. Two weeks ago, he pulled off one of the biggest robberies in criminal history. Somehow, he got into the U.S. Mint and stole the engraving plates of our hundred dollar bill. All we have to do is get those plates back before he peddles them to an unfriendly power who'll probably use them to attack our currency.
Jaime: And you think he's gone to Hidalgo and you want me to follow him in there.
Jaime: Wrong. Listen, you've got plenty of men who can handle this job - why are you sending me?
Oscar: I sent two of my agents into Hidalgo. I haven't heard from them since.
Jaime: (sarcastically) Oh, swell.
Oscar: And besides, one of the few things we know about Frank Boylan is that he has... a great fondness for... beautiful ladies, and since you're the most beautiful lady in the OSI, I thought...
Jaime: You think all this flattery is gonna get me to go, don't you? Yeah, it probably will.
Petey: (reaches for the money) Sommers, about the flash roll... (Jaime smacks his hand) You sure that there's nothin'... funny about it?
Petey: You know... queer... wouldn't be the first time the government sent somebody in with counterfeit and them not knowin' about it...
Jaime: Petey - you know what? There ain't no way you're gettin' your hands on that money, to see it, feel it, smell it, touch it, no way, nada, okay?
Petey: I was, I was just testing to see if I could trust you. You scored zip. Zip!
Jaime: I want your word, Petey.
Petey: My word? That ain't worth nothing. What do you think they call me 'The Weasel' for?
Colonel: Are your neckhairs high enough yet for me to start forming a firing squad?
Gustave: Just about... Order them shot if they try and leave again.
Madeline: (about Jaime) She was trying to rob me.
One Eyed One: Robbing? That is a man's work. I am taking you to Señor Gustave.
Gustave: A dancer? Well, my guests get little enough entertainment as it is, so you must dance for us. And I'll feed your fingers to the iguanas before I kill you both, if she doesn't dance very, very good.
Gustave: Oh ladies and gentlemen, we have a rare treat in store for us today: this charming young lady is going to dance for us. [some applause from the customers] And immediately following that, we may have a surprise encore: the execution of a police spy.
Jaime: (voice over) Oh I hope I can remember how Carmen Miranda did it.
- Diane Civita also appeared in the second season episodes "Jaime's Shield" and "Jaime's Shield (Part II)" as Arleen Smith/Arleen Hart.
- The getaway scene in which the bad guys are all washed away by a deluge of water was filmed at Universal Studios. The flashflood continues to feature as an attraction in the Universal Studios Backlot tour and has done since 1968.
- Henry Kingi (One-Eyed-One) was Lindsay Wagner's third husband from 1981 to 1984 and is the father of her two children, Dorian (b. 1982) and Alex (b. 1986). They met on the set of The Bionic Woman. Kingi also appeared in All For One and The Pyramid.
They keep calling the plates "engraving plates" when in reality they are printing plates. More accurately they are "engraved plates".